An Imaginary Telephone Conversation with Frodo Baggins
(Ring ring!)
Me: Hello?
Frodo: Hello, Kevin. What are you doing this afternoon?
Me: Nothing much. Just watching some tv. Why?
Frodo: Would you like to come over to my place and partake of some ale and maybe sing some songs?
Me: Well…that sounds great, but my girlfriend took the car, and…
Frodo: You could walk.
Me: Yeah…
Frodo: It’s just around a mile and a half…
Me: I…I just don’t feel like walking that far right now.
Frodo: Really.
Me: Yeah, that just seems like a really long walk, and I’m kinda tired…you know how it is. It just seems like a major ordeal.
Frodo: (Silent but for steady, angry breathing.)
Me: And I’ve got this blister on my foot.
Frodo: You know, Kevin…I’m not really certain why we’re friends.
