Too Happy to Finish
The other day, I let my dog out to do what dogs do. She wandered around the front yard for a couple minutes, peeing here, sniffing here, until she finally picked the spot where she wanted to poop. This is always cause for celebration in my daily life, so I said, “Good doggie!” and gave her an affirming little golf-clap in the hope that this would encourage her to take a few minutes less to find her shitting spot next time.
She became so excited by my encouragement that she happily ran toward me, her ears flapping, drool dripping, and nuggets of shit popping out of her butt in rhythm with her gate. The moment was too thrilling for her to finish pooping.
I think this might be the definitive difference between humans and dogs, because from my experience, when you try this with humans, they call you a fucking pervert and slam the bathroom door in your face.
