Hungry Like Kevin http://hungrylikekevin.posterous.com Most recent posts at Hungry Like Kevin posterous.com Tue, 14 Jun 2011 15:08:00 -0700 This Is Why I Hate Most Memes http://hungrylikekevin.posterous.com/this-is-why-i-hate-most-memes http://hungrylikekevin.posterous.com/this-is-why-i-hate-most-memes

(Except for the ones I invent that nobody else participates in.)

There's a meme bouncing around right now that goes like this: hit the random article button at Wikipedia, and whatever comes up is the name of your genitals. Haha, right? Everybody's posting stuff like "Yangtze river" or "strike force" and other funny stuff. What did I wind up with?

1965 All England Open Badminton Championships.

Hey! Where's my funny penis nickname? Then I realized something: most people are cheating, just hitting the random button until something funny comes up, which really defeats the entire purpose of the meme. And really, isn't that what everybody does when a meme like this rolls around? Just fake it to make it, right? That's what the Internet is all about. If you're gonna do that, you might as well just make something up.

In that spirit, I'd like to announce my new totally legitimate Wikipedia random article penis name:

Godzilla Vs. Mechagodzilla.

Please use this name when referring to my penis from now on (it comes up in your personal conversations all the time, I'm sure), since it was totally accurately named by Wikipedia with no assistance from myself whatsoever.

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Mon, 13 Jun 2011 13:29:00 -0700 Gotta Love Them Blog Memes, Boy http://hungrylikekevin.posterous.com/gotta-love-them-blog-memes-boy http://hungrylikekevin.posterous.com/gotta-love-them-blog-memes-boy

Lolmemes

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Sun, 15 May 2011 10:38:00 -0700 Meme Roster for Posterous http://hungrylikekevin.posterous.com/meme-roster-for-posterous http://hungrylikekevin.posterous.com/meme-roster-for-posterous

One of the things I'll miss just so, so terribly about Tumblr is that every day over there has some stupid theme associated with it that there is tremendou peer pressure to participate in. Sexy Sex Thursdays, or Truthful Tuesdays, or random, "Hey, everybody, show your butts to strangers" days that people declare whenever they feel like it.

Boy! That sure is fun. Sure gonna miss that aspect of my Tumblr dashboard, yep.

In an attempt to make Posterous just as friggin' fun as Tumblr, here are some ideas for some theme days.

SUNDAY: Scumday! Tell us about the scummiest things you've ever done! Did you steal your grandma's Social Security checks to buy meth? Did you pleasure yourself while watching nubile middle schoolers undressing in a window across the street? Haha, go ahead and tell the Internet about it. It's all in good fun!

MONDAY: Morbid Monday! Contemplate the empty eternity that is death. How does it make you feel to know that you will not live forever? Post about this. FUN!

TUESDAY: Tossin' Tuesday! Just go right ahead and masturbate in front of the whole Internet. It's what you're metaphorically doing with all of these memes and theme days anyway, so you might as well stop pretending.

WEDNESDAY: Willem DaWednesday! Pics, images, gifs, and Penthouse Forum letters about Willem Dafoe!. In my estimation, he doesn't get enough Internet love, what with Johnny Depp and Christopher Walken stealing it all. This is a completely legitimate and not at all idiotic thing to do on Wednesday.

THURSDAY: Thufferin' Thuccotash Thursday! Post a vid or audio post of you...lisping! Haha! This will never stop being hilarious, even after you've done it twenty times!

FRIDAY: Furious Friday! Who pisses you off on the Internet? Call them out and tell them exactly how much they infuriate you. Yeah, burn some fucking bridges! Internet drama happens all the time; it might as well have its own day.

SATURDAY: Insatiable Saturday! Apparently, people on social networks are really horny and nobody's getting enough sex. Why not whine about it in a long, needy post? That'll be fun, right? No better people to air your sexual frustrations to than virtual strangers that live in the magic box on your desk, after all.

Whew!

There you go, Posterous. I thought long and hard about these (seriously, at least, like, ten seconds of thought went into every one), and I think everybody will agree that they will improve the Posterous experience considerably. They might even convince some Tumblr people to flee that sinking ship and come someplace where everything works.

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http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/983943/TemplePic.jpg http://posterous.com/users/he614WNGNdpNw Kevin Stone hungrylikekevin Kevin Stone