A Terrible Realization

My challenge to myself to avoid the big-time profanities for month and a half are going to make it really difficult for to to get further attention on the Internet, right when I'm actually trying to get further attention on the Internet.

Which kinda sucks, you know? Tumblr, especially (which is not where I prefer to be but where all the interaction really is), really rewards people for being obscene. Half the pages over there seem to include the phrase "f--- yeah" in their titles, and another 40% are porn blogs.

Is there room on the Internet for a funny guy who's just challenging himself to be funny without cursing so much? I wonder.

Hm.

I never said I wouldn't flash my penis, though. I always have that option.

Blog Roll-Call

I have a few side-projects, a couple of which have started updating again after a long fallow period. Here they all are, along with the updating frequency that you can expect:

  • The Metrics -- My main alternative blog, where I post silly things such as Top Fives, lists, how-tos, flowcharts and descriptive images. Oh, also reviews. If you want the full Kevin experience, you should follow this blog as well. Updated regularly.
  • Danzkids -- A Tumblr dedicated to images of kids from 70's and 80's films overlayed with lyrics from Glenn Danzig tunes. Not as creepy as it sounds, or maybe it is. I don't know, it's just funny to me. Updated regularly.
  • Harrison Ford Points at Stuff -- A new project on Tumblr, this one collects images of Harrison Ford pointing in his movies and explains what he's pointing at. This is the dumbest Tumblr ever. Updated regularly until I run out of pictures of Ford pointing at stuff.
  • Gripping Tales of Men -- My fiction Tumblr, containing short genre fiction from me and other contributors. It may move to Posterous one day. Updates sporadically as new stuff is created/is submitted.
  • James Bond's Dog -- The Tumblr of the loneliest dog in the world. Recently posting again after a long silence. Updates sporadically.
  • The Adventures of Stakeout Detective -- The journal of a seedy private eye. Will likely never update again, but you never can tell, so you might as well follow it just in case.

Happy reading.

Every Time I Post Something Now...

...I find myself pausing to consider if two people I've never even met will disapprove of it, and that pisses me off. They've already made up their minds anyway, and I really don't care if anybody approves of me. I already have a ton of people who approve of me, and arguably the people who love me are the only people who matter.

So, yeah...it's their loss, really. I'm a pretty good person, regardless of who I choose not to worship, regardless of the fact that, yes, I enjoy sex, and regardless of whether or not they "get" my jokes.

I guess they have enough friends that they can afford to pre-judge people this way. I have friends who probably voted for McCain in the last presidential election, who have faith in Christ and who listen to appalling music. But they're still my friends, because I don't go around throwing people away when they disagree with me.

I think somebody had something to say about tolerance that they put in a book or something one time. I can't remember who it was right now, but it was something about casting stones. That guy was a smart dude in a lot of ways, don't you think?

Bitch, Bitch, Bitch

Everybody on Tumblr is bitching about Tumblr. Again. It's freaking out. Again. Nothing works right. Again.

I've shown them a very similar website in which everything works most of the time. I've shown them how you can easily set things up to post to your Tumblr, so that your Tumblr friends won't miss any of your posts. I've shown them how commenting works better on Posterous. Posterous, basically, is an infinitely superior version of Tumblr, just without the comfy Tumblr cutesiness that I guess they need, because they just keep bitching about Tumblr while making no effort to improve their blogging experience in any way.

I keep hearing about how the "community" and the "people" are why people stay there. Well, guess what: if you all come to Posterous, where they have their shit together, then the "people" and "community" will all be here.

Just sayin'.

You can either make a change and come somewhere where bitching about the crappy service isn't an accepted part of the experience, or you can keep wallowing in shit and complaining about it.

I approve this message.